I am currently sitting on the other side of the world – literally! After almost two days of travelling, losing a day and getting a really sore bum, I have made it to the United Kingdom in my quest to fulfil my role as WAG* to my actor / public servant / carpenter / singer in a choir husband. A role I think I am going to relish.
For once in my life I have to give up control, and those who know me or who have glanced at the front cover of our book ISSUES? What Issues? will know that being the boss and having control over any given situation is my forte … giving it up isn’t. But you know what? I am excited about ‘letting go’ and having someone tell me where I need to be and what we will be doing. And it has already started.
See, we boarded the plane for our Dubai stopover, however, one on the plane we were informed we would be stopping over at Singapore as well. My first reaction was to fall into panic mode and double-check our tickets to see if we were on the right flight, but then a sense of calm came over me … of course we were on the right flight, and hey, if Captain Emirates wants to stop over in Singapore, well, who am I to argue? Stop away Cap! Besides, your crew were doing an awesome job feeding me full of sensational, though stodgy, airline food, all in cute little min meal sizes.
So our flight went smoothly, stopping over briefly in both Singapore and Dubai. I managed a few hours of head nodding, drooling sleep and also managed to control my bladder so I didn’t have to face the aeroplane toilets – not once! (I didn’t highlight in my first diary entry that I have a phobia of aeroplane toilets … actually, make that public toilets in general). We ate 12 airline meals plus a packet of retro party mix lollies and a packet of Clinkers (side note: why are they all green?). All in all it was a great flight, albeit long, and we arrived at Heathrow Airport at 7:00pm on Friday night, ready to check into our dodgy airport hotel (in full daylight I might add – kooky country).
At said dodgy airport hotel we kept up the stodgy food theme and ordered a cheesy burger and fries through room service while I had to hand wash half my luggage which had succumbed to a burst bottle of nail polish remover. Fun times.
But the holiday is now in full swing. This is the first time I have opened my computer in count them … three days. If that were Alli she would have had a mental breakdown by now and started developing a facial twitch. Me – I couldn’t be happier to give it up. And my iPhone has been left alone in my room each day to have some time out too. I am only contemplating getting a local sim card; I mean, what does a WAG need a phone for when she is on tour? We have our tour itinerary which tells us what time we have to have breakfast, what time we need to be on the bus, what time rehearsal is (which for me means shopping time – if I liked shopping, which I don’t) and what time each concert is on (i.e. what time I need to get my WAG on). Easy!Our first outing in the UK to Westminster Abbey – I forgot my big sunglasses … not very WAG-like
So I am off now to have a hotel breakfast and finally meet up with the choir crew. Wish me luck as I slip into WAG mode … now where are my ridiculously over-sized sunglasses and hair extensions …?
WAG* (abbv: wives and girlfriends)
A selection of overpublicised, vacuous anorexics found lurking at football matches, easily distinguished by their orange skin tone and high body plastic index, ostensibly present for the purpose of pleasuring the England football team, but in reality with the intention of being photographed obtaining fashion advice from chief WAG Mrs. Beckham in the hope that this will lead to a future appearance on “celebrity love island”. Urban DictionaryGenine needs to get her WAG-on just like Posh – mandatory: hair extensions and over-sized sunglasses